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    5 Reasons You Should Have Sex With Your Husband Every Night

    I was getting a manicure the first time I learned that not all wives want to, ahem, go for a roll in the hay with their husbands. I was 16 and had picked out orange nail polish (oh, sixteen). I had a book with me but it wasn't long before I found another source of entertainment. In-between buffings and polishings, the two women next to me talked about how much their husbands wanted IT and how little they wanted to give IT.

    For a girl that had not even been asked out on a date this was a whole new world. I had a suspicion that their experience was more realistic than the articles I sneaky read in Cosmo while getting my hair done at the salon. (I am supposed to put my hand WHERE? while simultaneously doing WHAT?) So I kept my eyes on my book, let the words blur into lines and listened closely.

    "Doesn't he know how tired I am by the end of the day? As if after the kids are finally asleep I have the energy to do anything but sit down and watch some TV."

    "For me, it isn't even the energy it takes. I am still losing weight from the baby. I don't feel sexy. I can hardly undress in front of a mirror, let alone in front of him. I honestly think it is selfish that he expects me to pretend to feel something that I don't."

    "Selfish? That's a good word. Maybe if he took care of the kids when he got home or made dinner once in a while I would be more interested. Hell, just pick up the milk on the way home from work. I am not asking for much. Now that I think about it, I don't think we have done it in the last three weeks."

    "Yeah. It's been at least two for us."

    Wait. These women were married...they lived with a guy....who slept in their bed. They could have sex all the time! And they didn't want to? It made no sense. It was like turning down a zero calorie but as delicious-as-creme-brulee dessert. (Or at least I assumed. At that point everything I knew about romance was gleaned from Anne of Green Gables and Moulin Rouge.)

    How sad. How wasteful. How stupid. When I got married, I would always want to have sex with my husband! And I would never be too tired. My goodness, it was just ridiculous to want him to bring home a gallon of milk just to prove he cared. Wasn't it just like a woman to make a grocery run a test of love. As the final coat of polish was applied to my nails, I swore to never be like them. My life would be different. I would be better. I would never feel too fat or too tired. Ever.

    And then I grew up.

    Intercourse, carnal knowledge, lovemaking, knocking boots, coitus, SEX! is everything 16 year old me imagined plus a little whipped cream on top. (Whipped cream, see what I did there?) And once Riley and I got married there was lots and lots and lots of it. Then we had a baby and I really was just so tired my bones hurt. And for a while I did feel fat. Even after I lost the pregnancy weight everything just looked different. Like a cut flower that has been left out in the sun, still lovely just a little...wilted. I became a little distant. We started to fall asleep without talking or kissing.

    Then one day while washing dishes, I realized that we had gone eight days without touching each other. Eight days was a quite some time for us. But the thing that bothered me the most was that I hadn't missed it. And I knew that was a problem. So that night after we put the baby to bed, I gave Riley my best come hither glance. Yes, I was tired and felt about as desirable as the "feed the birds" lady in Mary Poppins. But while drying the dishes, it occurred to me that 16 year old Meg must have understood something about sex that 20-something Meg had forgotten. And maybe, just maybe it was worth remembering.
    Without further ado here are five reasons you should have sex with your husband every night:

    1. Being a mother, one of the ultimate expressions of womanhood, can often leave a girl feeling stripped of her femininity. There is something about being covered in spit up and attending to the every need of another human being that makes one feel distinctly gender neutral. Most of my days are spent playing with dolls, wiping baby food off of my clothes, changing diapers, wiping snot off of my clothes, going to the park, and wiping what-the-heavens-is-that off of my clothes. There is something restorative about kissing the boy you love. There are times in Riley's arms when I remember who I am before I even realize I have forgotten. Yes, I am a cook, cleaner, teacher, and wiper of all things disgusting. But I am also something more, something delightful and completely apart from my roles. I am a woman! And there is potential and depth and heck, I am pretty darn good kisser, too. It is a lovely thing, finding yourself through the touch of someone else.

    2. If you want your husband to act like a man, you need to treat him like a man. Hold the eye rolls. I am not pushing for a return to the 1950′s. (Although, heaven knows an era in which low rise jeans did not exist is basically alright by me.) Women need any number of criteria met to feel loved. Men are far simpler. They need to be fed, they need to be appreciated, and they need to have sex. That is it. Really. So make or order dinner once in a while. Say thank you for the long hours spent at work with a hug and smile when he walks through the door each night. (Better yet? Smile as you hand him the kids and walk out the door for a long, much needed break.) And my goodness, let the poor man see you naked. It is astounding what a good man will do for a good woman that has made him feel loved. After a few weeks of meals and make outs, you will sit back and wonder why you didn't insist on having sex every night sooner. Talk about a small investment and big returns.

    3. You need to have a moment in each day that is just about the two of you. Remember that boy? The one that made your heart thump and hands sweat? The one that called when you hoped he would, that made you run hot and high up to the stars until you thought you would never come down? He is still there. Under the years and bills and worries, that smiling boy is still in love with and needs his smiling girl. Every night after the kids go to bed is a chance to find him again. A moment to remind yourself that you are living a picket fenced adventure and my goodness, there is nothing the two of you can't do.

    4. Sex relieves stress. I don't know that this one needs much explanation. As a mother I eat stress for breakfast. So it seems to me I have a choice. I can let off steam by A) driving around at night and bashing in strangers mailboxes or B) I can get down and dirty with that one guy I married that one time. I choose option B. (So far the mailboxes in my neighborhood have escaped unscathed, so Option B must be working.)

    5. It is so much blasted fun. Seriously. Why are we so quick to refuse the good things in life? We will slog through our children's Algebra homework, do Zumba in public and pluck the hair from our body ONE PIECE AT A TIME. But tell a girl to have sex every night and she looks at you like you are crazy, An orgasm? Every night? What do I look like? A Nymphomaniacal Super Woman?

    Where is the logic in that?

    Are we really too busy doing dishes to participate in an activity that is so good it has inspired genius (that saucy Shakespeare) and changed history (Okay, Helen of Troy, we get it. You were super hot)? My goodness, what a crazy way to live. Ladies, did it ever occur to you (to us!) that we should have sex because WE DESERVE IT?

    Yeah, you deserve it.

    So, tonight put the kids to bed. Leave the dishes in the sink and the floors unswept. They will wait. Take a moment to remember that you are the girl you hoped you would be and then go find that boy and remind him that he is the man you knew he could be.

    "Sex and the City" Stars -- 15 Years Later!

    15 years ago today, HBO premiered the first episode of a show that would introduce the world to Manolos, cosmos and the one and only Carrie Bradshaw.

    Yep, "Sex and the City."

    The show debuted on June 6, 1998 and pop culture hasn't been the same since -- transforming Sarah Jessica Parker from "That Witch in 'Hocus Pocus'" to a full-fledged fashion icon and coining terms terms like "manthrax," "modelizer" and "fashion roadkill."

    The 94-episode series ran for six seasons, spawned two film spinoffs and the TV prequel "The Carrie Diaries."

    And it's pretty crazy how much the lives of the show's stars -- including Kim Cattrall, Kristin Davis and Cynthia Nixon -- have changed since its 1998 debut.

    They've gone on to become award winners and proud parents. The supporting cast has earned accolades too; one appeared nude on Broadway and one will even appear in the next "Hunger Games" movie.

    Click the gallery above to see how they've changed through the years, plus check in on some of Carrie's more famous lovers!

    10 Things No One Tells You About Married Sex

    Saying "I Do" can be a libido booster, so he might want even more sex now.

    You've stopped obsessing about how you look, so you're enjoying sex more than ever!

    It's easy to get lazy about taking your birth control-that surprise pregnancy is less of a big deal now.

    You'll do things that you never thought you'd do (hello, sex toys!) to keep things exciting.

    Quickies are the new norm, and you love 'em.

    How many calories does sex burn?

    You have random romps that are so hot it's like the first time all over again (only better).

    You'll dream about sex with old boyfriends once in a while. (Don't worry, it's normal!)

    His obsession with oral sex will never go away, even after you've been married for years.

    At times you'll feel like your husband is cheating on you…with porn.

    None of this sound familiar? For some couples married sex is exactly the same as it was before they were married.

    Flies' Loud Sex Makes Insects Vulnerable To Bats, Study Shows

    Flies may not scream out in ecstasy during sex, but they do create quite a buzz with their wings. And now researchers have found these mating moans can be heard by bats hungry for a meal.

    The result: Wild Natterer's bats get a double-size meal of copulating flies; the mating flies, rather than offspring, get death.

    In the study, detailed this week in the journal Current Biology, Stefan Greif from the Max Planck Institute for Ornithology in Germany and colleagues found bats didn't seem to notice the flies walking on a ceiling or just sitting. That suggests there's something about mating sounds that outs the flies to bat predators.

    The researchers said this is one of very few studies to show that copulating animals are at a higher risk of being eaten by predators. Other examples include studies on amphipods, water striders and other aquatic insects, as well as land insects like the Australian plague locust.

    In a cowshed in Marburg, Germany, the researchers video-recorded the movements of 9,000 houseflies over four years. Results showed the flies rarely fly at night, when they mainly sit or run on the ceiling; the faint, lower frequency, noise made by these movements, it seems, was drowned out by a strong background echo. [The Animal Sex Quiz]

    "The faint insect echo [of non-mating flies] is fully overlapped and masked by massive echoes from the background," the researchers write.

    10 Random Sex Facts

        1- During 30 minutes of active sex, the average person burns approximately 200 calories.e
        2- On average, adult men think about sex every seven seconds.e

        3- Having sex at least once per week can lower a man’s risk of heart disease by 30%,

     4- stroke by 50%, and diabetes by 40%. It has also been shown that men with an active sex life are more likely to live past 80 years.f

        5- The average size of an erect penis measures between 5 and 6 inches, while the average size of a flaccid penis is about 3.5 inches.e

        6- The sperm count of the average American male in 2008 was down nearly 30% from the sperm count of an average American male 30 years ago.h
        7- Viagra was released in 1998 with over $411 million in profits within its first three months

        8- Viagra, the well-known blue pill designed to help with erectile dysfunction, made $411 million in profits within the first three months of its release in 1998 before going on to make $1.8 billion in 2003.g

        9- Use of the condom was first noted in published literature in the early 1500s. The device was originally made of linen, and historians believe the legendary lover Casanova used linen condoms.a

        10- Historical records show that even in 1850 B.C., women attempted to practice birth control. The most common method was a mixture of crocodile dung and honey placed in the vagina in the hopes of preventing pregnancy.a

    5 Sex Positions Men Love

    7 Sex Positions Men Love
    The bedroom moves that men love: try these sex positions tonight. Want to spice things up in the bedroom? Make his night and drive him crazy with these sex positions that men love. Ultimately, sex is about love and intimacy, so while the positions are part of the fun, the real payoff is the way various maneuvers allow you to connect and explore each other in different ways.

    1. Woman on Top: Ask your guy what drives him crazy in the bedroom, and we're betting he'll say it's pleasing you. This sexy position puts you in the driver's seat, and that's exactly where he wants you. Take advantage of being in control and set the pace according to what you like, leaving his hands free to roam. The bonus? He loves having your curves in full view…so flip on the lights and give him a show.

    2. Missionary: This standard go-to is a favorite because it puts him in control, while still being intimate: your hips are free to do all the work, and you can lock lips and eyes with ease. And while he's in the power position on top of you, the two of you can set the pace together. If you want him to go slower or deeper, put your hands on his hips and guide him. The best sex is like a conversation, and missionary allows you to communicate with your bodies. 6 Ways Couples Can Rediscover Erotic Sex

    3. Reverse Cowgirl: This reverse variation of the woman on top position is the best of both worlds for your guy. It gives him the sexy view he gets during doggie style but it puts you in control. This position doesn't allow for a ton of touching or eye contact, but it's a nice contrast to some of the more classic, romantic positions. If you're craving a connection flash a look back at him while you're doing your thing—it'll drive both of you over the edge.

    4. Doggie Style: This rear entry positions puts him in control, allowing him to call the shots and to go at the speed that's best for him. Plus, it allows for deeper penetration, making him feel like king in the bedroom. Some women love the intense full feeling, but if it feels like too much, let him know. Communication is key to enjoying sex and experiencing the full psychological benefits of physical intimacy. 20 Best Sex Quotes From Romantic Comedies

    5. Standing Up: Getting it on while standing up is probably not your go-to move, but it's perfect for that sweaty, gotta-have-you-now sex that'll make him feel irresistible. Whether he's bending you over the new kitchen table or you're steadying yourself against the wall, this spontaneous position is perfect for a quickie.

    How to Romance a Man

    I know, you’re thinking that to romance a man you just need to show up naked, but I think you might be wrong. So often we hear that the man should be the romantic one, and maybe 50 years ago this would have been so but this is 2008, and men like to be spoiled too. Think back to when you first met. The first dates, wining an dining, making an effort to look your best, breakfast in bed, long weekends having frantic sex. Dont you wish it was the same? Well I bet your partner also does. Instead of waiting for him to make the first move (after all we know how slow men are in the romantic take-up department. No offense guys) you take the lead and add a bit of romance into your relationship. Show off your romantic side. 1. Pick up the phone: Give him a ring while he is at the office just to let him know that you are thinking of him. Or if you are confident with phone sex tell him what you are going to do to him once he gets home and in turn what you would like him to do to you. 2. Fill the stocking: Men love sexy lingerie just as much as women if not more. Let him know how much you want him by getting out your best panties, team them with a pair of fishnets, stilettos and seduce him tonight. 3. Feed his heart: You know the old saying the way to a mans heart is through his stomach! Well you better believe it because it works every time. Get out the best dinner set set the table with candles, put on some soft music and prepare his favorite meal. You wont even need to think of dessert because this is where he will become romantic and wisk you of to the bedroom. 4. Flirt: When was the last time you actually flirted with your partner? Go out in public (to dinner, to a party or nightclub) and try it. It will boost both your egos bring back those old feelings of lust for one an other. Think like a single person and see what happens 5. Bedroom boudoir: Set the mood in your bedroom. Clear out all the clutter, change the bed linen (bring in some silk sheets perhaps) and fill the room with scented candles. Stand a bottle of your favorite bubbly in some ice, lay your sexiest lingerie on the bed and keep a box of his favorite chocolates near by. This is also an inexpensive way to give your bedroom a new look. 6. Use toys: If you want to add some spice to your love making then what better way then to introduce some props. We are not talking about 12? dildos (unless you want to that is) it can be something as small as a silk scarf or as daring as vibrators. Your man will need never be asked to make an effort again. 7. Watch a flick: Rent a romantic movie, order a take away, get out a bottle of your favorite wine, take the phone of the hook turn out the lights and snuggle into each other on the sofa in front of the TV. The romantic flick will soon have the two of you in the mood for love. 8. Love letters: Leave him little notes in his pocket, on his pillow, next to his mother any where that he will find them that will give him a nice surprise. 9. Kiss.. him all of his body slowly 10. 3 little words: Tell him that you love him at least once a day. This will keep the love there even if you havent always got time to express it, those 3 little words is all that you need.source

    Pam Shaw: 70-Year-Old British Virgin Looks For Suitor

    Steve Carell's character in Judd Apatow's "The 40-Year-Old Virgin" can breathe a sigh of relief; he's no longer the oldest virgin capturing pop culture's attention. Cabaret singer "The Sexational Pam" (or perhaps interested suitors should call her Pam Shaw, her real name) has announced that at 70 years old, she's ready to lose her virginity, UK's The Sun reports. Shaw said she has yet to lose her virginity because she believes in waiting for marriage. But Mr. Right never showed, though there was one close call, she told The Sun: "In 1976 I was proposed to by an oil rig worker in Blackpool. I said yes but later broke it off when I realised I didn’t fancy him." With more than 50 years of performing under her chastity belt, it's not that the vivacious Shaw didn't have her share of offers: “Men saw the outfits I wore on stage and thought I would be easy. But I’ve never really been intimate with a man, just a bit of kissing. I had a sexy stage name and dressed sexy but that was all for my career." From the oil rig worker in Blackpool to stars like singers Tom Jones and Englebert Humperdinck, Shaw's charms attracted flirtations, but never went further than that. But she remains optimistic: “I feel I am ready to give marriage a go and maybe go to bed with a man. You are never too old for anything. Just look at Joan Collins.”

    5 1/2 Myths About Female Sexuality

    I've been a sex educator since -- well, for a long time. And I am still crazed by the quantity of misinformation available to all of us at any given time. These myths are difficult to debunk; they have a long history and thousands of urban legends to back them up. But it doesn't mean they are correct. Far from it. So while there are plenty of myths about sex and sexuality, far more than the ones I have expanded on here, these are the ones I've chosen to tackle at this moment. If you caught me on another day, maybe I'd present an entirely new list.

    Most women have orgasms from sexual (vaginal) intercourse.

    Wouldn't we all love for this one to be true? Many experts and studies have found that about 70% of women do not have orgasms from (heterosexual vaginal) intercourse alone (without external clitoral stimulation). This clearly contradicts all the sex scenes we watch on television or in movies where it appears that everyone can climax on demand. (Which is really a shame because that would be nice.) So if you have been wondering what's wrong with you... well, absolutely nothing at all. We are not built the same as men, but the lens through which we talk about sex (or see it) is often male. Many of us wind up feeling badly if our experiences don't match our expectations -- or we start to question the prowess of our partner (but that's another blog post altogether). And don't get me started on pornography -- it can certainly be entertaining, but hardly represents reality. That aside, yes, there are some women who suffer from medical conditions that make orgasm (and even intercourse) difficult or impossible. However, the majority of women are not experiencing sexual dysfunction; we just haven't been given great sex education.

    Oral (or anal) sex doesn't count as sex.

    I always find it interesting that we seem to have a hierarchy of sex behaviors. Consider the rationalization: I can have oral or anal sex but it's not really sex so I don't have to count it as having a sex partner. Or I can do this and still be considered a virgin. Or... you get the point. And to complicate matters, depending on who you ask, that hierarchy may change. So here are a few thoughts: All forms of sex are sex. They are all intimate personal behaviors with the capacity for great pleasure and if practiced without protection, the potential for certain negative outcomes, too. Did I convince you? If not, try this: Sex is not just for straight people, which is basically what we're saying when we suggest that vaginal intercourse is the only true form of sex.

    You would know if your partner has a sexually transmitted infection.

    In my eleventh grade health class, our teacher showed us photos of penises and vulvas (notice I did not say vagina?) ravaged by sexually transmitted infections. My health class probably wasn't unique. Lots of us were shown these photos as a means of curbing our sexual behavior. Did it work? Nope. It actually backfired. I remember my fellow students squirming in their seats. "That's disgusting!" they screamed as they looked at images of cauliflower-like warts and oozing blisters. While on the surface it may sound like a great way to scare us out of any or all sexual activity, it didn't (shocking, I know). What it actually did was incorrectly teach us that sexually transmitted infections have visible (and quite grotesque) symptoms. (They don't, most of the time.) The fact is, you cannot tell if a partner has a sexually transmitted infection just by looking at their genitals. The only way to know for certain is for you and your partners to get tested.

    Extra Girly Genes Boost Male Sex Drive

    Women may not be known as the gender with the highest sex drive, but it turns out, at least in mice, males with an extra "girly" sex chromosome seemed to have an insatiable appetite for sex.

    In mammals, gender is determined by "sex chromosomes," the X and Y. If you have two X chromosomes, you are a female. If you have one X and one Y, you are a male. (Chromosomes are long strings of DNA that hold many genes; humans have 23 pairs of chromosomes, one set inherited from each parent.)

    The study was done in mice, not humans, but the genes that determine sex are similar in mammals, so the results might be applicable, especially in males with Klinefelter's syndrome, who are genetically XXY.

    "Whether this is a specific phenomenon to mice, or even to this particular inbred background strain of laboratory mice, is still an open question, but we did find similar results in two different genetic models of mice," study researcher Paul Bonthuis, a graduate student at the University of Virginia, told LiveScience in an email. "To know how general the finding is to other mammals one would have to do studies with other mammalian species directly."

    The researchers studied two special lines of mice.

    In the first, they were able to separate the effects of the X and Y chromosomes from the mouse's sexual development (which is dependent on one gene on the Y chromosome). This means that even lab mice with odd numbers of sex chromosomes — for instance males with two X's or females that have a Y — still developed normally; they had normal genitalia and sexual behaviors for their gender.

    In another genetically engineered mouse model the researchers linked the X and Y chromosome so this pair could be matched up with an X chromosome, resulting in genetically XXY males.

    These two models provided different parts of the puzzle, with the first one revealing developmental differences created by genes on either the X or Y chromosome that aren't involved in normal development. The second model would reveal how an extra X chromosome affected the male mice.

    Sex hormone levels were normal in all of these special lines of mice.

    When they studied these mice, they found that the males with two X chromosomes (the XXY males) were about twice as fast to ejaculate and ejaculated nearly twice as often than those with only one. They also mounted females more often and during sex showed more pelvic-thrusting motions.

    Sex: 3 Reasons Why You May Not Be Enjoying It

    When I decided to become a professional sexuality educator, I had one particular goal: I wanted women to speak honestly about sex in order to maximize their physical and emotional pleasure. Sure, that may seem like a tall order, but I'm an optimist. Why is this an important issue? There are lots of women engaging in sex (of all kinds) but not having pleasurable experiences. That seems silly to me. If you're having sex (of any kind), it should be fulfilling on a number of levels. So here is just a small sample of the physical and emotional issues that can affect your ability to enjoy sex and in many cases, you can do something about it. But the first step is figuring out what is going on.

    1. You're Just Not Ready

    In order to really enjoy sex, your body needs to be ready. Not just mentally or emotionally ready, but physically, biologically ready.

    Before a woman can experience orgasm, her body goes through a sexual response cycle (Masters and Johnson). During that cycle, a woman gets aroused, blood pools in her genitals and breasts, there is increased muscle tension, vaginal lubrication and expansion of the vagina. And that's not all: the labia spread and her breasts and clitoris swell. As the cycle continues, women develop a "sex flush" (a reddish blush over the breasts and genital area) and the labia spread even further ... basically the labia are saying "I'm ready!" Now, that's great, but most of us have intercourse before we get to that point. And you know what your body is saying then? "Wait -- a little more foreplay, please! Soon ... just not yet." But if we are not voicing that to our partners, we're not maximizing our sexual pleasure. Foreplay isn't just something that we like; foreplay is something that we need. If a woman isn't lubricated enough (and not all women produce enough vaginal lubrication; this is why we buy some at the drug store or specialty sex boutique), sex isn't going to be as enjoyable as it could be if we were really ready.

    2. You're Guilty

    I've said it before, and I'll say it again. Other than our skin, our brains are our biggest sex organ. If our brain isn't into sex, it's extraordinary difficult for our bodies to be. Perhaps the biggest contributor to our brain's inability to fully engage and enjoy sex comes from years of mixed and unhealthy messaging about female sexuality. If during your childhood you were told about the "loose" girls or the (ugh, I hate this term) "promiscuous" ones, you were getting some insidious messages about female sexuality. You were being told (deliberately or inadvertently) about the sexual double standard. You were not supposed to want sex; you weren't supposed to enjoy sex. (Sadly, with the "slut" banter and anti-contraception movement going on today, it still seems like demonizing female sexuality is acceptable and a means of achieving political success.)

    Guilt and shame surrounding sex creates a mindset where it's very difficult to be fully engaged in sex (of any kind). Perhaps if we stopped shaming we could get to a place of enjoying.

    3. You're Not Into Your Partner

    Okay, so no one really wants to be the one to say it, but if you're not enjoying sex, it may be because you're not really interested in the person you're having sex with. Maybe they are selfish lovers; maybe their hygiene is questionable. For whatever reason, if your partner isn't getting you excited, sex isn't going to be all that exciting. Of course, there's always the chance that your lack of interest isn't that extreme. Maybe you've had a fight with your partner and you're angry. In some cases, no amount of make up sex is going to make it okay. Think about your relationship and if it is playing a role in whether or not sex is satisfying for you.

    Undie Awards 2011 Crown Best Bras, Briefs And More

    This just in: the winners of the 2011 Undie Awards!
    Over 40,000 people voted on TheUndies.com, picking the best boxers, briefs and bras. Although Victoria's Secret ads would have you believe that most women romp around in black lace thongs and satin lingerie, it turns out that Americans love their white cotton briefs and full-coverage brassieres, too.

    Click through to see which garments garnered top honors and let us know which ones score high marks in your book. And check out all of the first place choices here

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